| | Save yourself! ... wait a minute...
Isaiah 30 [link]
For whatever reason, I wish we all didn't think like that.
Something bad happens. It doesn't even need to be something big. Let's say we get a paper-cut. What do we do? We run to save ourselves. We grab the Neosporin bottle, slap a band-aid on, and then just wait for it to heal itself. Do we even talk to God about it? Perhaps only to say, "Why, God, did I get a paper-cut NOW!?"
We have worked hard to become independent. To become independent from our families, from our friends, and from even God. We have our own cups of sugar now, thank you much. We all have cars so we can get to the Super-Mega-Wal-Mart which is our one-stop shop so we don't waste time. Where else can you get paint, new car tires, a gerbil, and 10 pounds of "fresh" lobster? After all, it would be inconvenient to go so many places. Let's make sure to use the "self checkout" line, too, so that we don't have to wait on others in front of us or get caught with that one really slow bagger/checkout station worker.
So naturally, when larger things happen, we panic. We micro-manage ourselves to a healthy degree after awhile (no one's going to fault you for buying a tube of toothpaste a week before you run out, come on now); however, when someone gets hospitalized, laid off from work, or every one of your credit cards has finally maxed out... where do we run?
We find that we have no friends. We did everything on our own, and to do so quite often it meant telling other people no. We couldn't volunteer because we had to work 60 hours a week to afford our daily double-mocha cappuccinos and rare coin collections. We spent all our money, time, and effort trying to fix our own problems, and so when things go wrong there's no one to help us. We then result with the desperate attempt to remedy things by going to whatever means possible to get what we need. We'll do things we'd never have done before in order to fix it, and then we'll be so bold as to try and justify our own actions as if they were okay.
This Scripture says otherwise. It says that those who wait upon the Lord are the lucky ones.
So what does that mean? Well here's what it doesn't mean:
- Those who "wait" are NOT the ones who are sitting there saying, "Okay God, WHEN are You going to move? I'm WAITING here! It's been 3 days and I've already asked You once for my wo/man of my dreams and s/he's not here yet!" They're not the ones saying that they're being put out by God making them wait. Those who actually ARE waiting are the ones who realize things are done on God's time, and not theirs. It's God's schedule, not ours, that runs the universe.
- They're also somewhere close to, but not over the edge of, being the one who says, "Okay God, if You want me to get that wo/man of my dreams, then I'll be right here in this room, and I won't do anything until it happens. I trust You, and so I want to show You how much I trust You by sitting in this room forever until she walks in and announces, 'Here I am!'" They are not the ones who do nothing, "wait"ing on God to do everything for them.
These two examples seem far fetched, but they're closer to home than we'd like to admit. I am constantly in the second camp, being very selective and making sure that the things I want God to fulfill, but I don't want to put the effort into -- those are the ones I say, "Okay, God -- You want it, then you do it. In the mean time, I'll 'wait' on You." I did it on some projects in college -- and I heartily believe that sometimes I called it right; however, we still have to be responsible for our own actions. The first I fell prey to, as well. I would ask God for help on a project that I felt completely unable to do. The night before, I'd get upset that I was so stuck, so I'd try to "force my way" into fixing it. LAter I'd find out one of my friends was free, and my project would get postponed or it would end up that no one else knew what to do, and so it'd all be rendered moot. I was expecting God to have to abide by not only my schedule, but the schedule set down by my professors.
So... will we reach out and try to save ourselves from disaster, or embrace it and live through it (instead of simply trying to dodge and avoid it)? Will we accept the hand God "deals us," or will we attempt to slip an ace out of our sleeve and cheat our way into a "better position"? Will we wait on God, or will we attempt to "make our own destiny"? Intellectually we all would say we want to wait on God. Now... the key is making that the real choice in our lives -- when there's more at stake than "what will my friends think of me if I say I'd have actually chosen otherwise in this hypothetical situation?"
Heavenly Father, help us to follow after You. Help us to glorify You ina ll that we do. Help us to bring great glory, honor, and praise to You. May we give to You all that You are so very worthy of! You are so amazing, Lord. Help us to do all that You would have us to do. Help us to do it without complaining. Help us to accept it, and to cry out to You, but still accept Your Will. Help us, Father, for without You we are helpless. Abba, I love You. We love You. May our love be shown to You in all we do, and may Your love for us pour out from us and onto those who live and breathe and move around us. May they then be inexplicably drawn to You. Abba, You are the reason we continue to exist. Help us to exist well, for You.
Amen.
Get your groove on
State: Good
Well then, the last two days or so have been pretty stinky as far as things go for "posting something." Last night Amy and I did a QT together (albeit short), and thus why I didn't post on here.
Tonight we're getting it done after supper, just like good boys and girls do. ;P Well... I mean the good ones who said they'd try to keep a schedule by always doing it after supper, and not like, "Everyone MUST do it right after supper, or they're doing it wrong!" You get my drift. ;P
Oddly enough, the message at church yesterday had a bit of it anchored in Isaiah 30 (tonight's text). If I'd have kept up with my QTs, I'd have done this on Saturday night and it might have added something even better to whatever I'll get tonight. Now I'll just have to augment with the passage, instead.
I don't remember if I've posted anything specific, but we caught ourselves 2 mice. The second one ended up dying on the sticky trap, so we disposed of him today in the trash. Can I just say something about this? I'm unsure why I'm asking, since it's my blog and I can basically write whatever I want to, though. x3
It bothered me. It bothered me a lot. It still does. I just... don't like it. It's a lose/lose situation (minus having one of those sphere/box traps I've just recently heard of). Personally, I think that mice are ridiculously cute, usually. Rats, no freaking way, but mice... ADORABLE! I am not such a fan of the, "Ha! Snapped your neck!" trick that was par for the course before, but it seems far better than the "stuck on fly-paper and starve to death" which our second poor mouse had to endure. Apparently, some people recommend taking it outside and whacking it with a shovel~!? WHAT THE HECK! Seriously!? I don't think I could EVER do that to a mouse, or anything living for that matter. It's death... it's killing something. I... don't have the heart for that. I don't see how people could do that and then go on like NOTHING just happened. It's horrible... ._.
Where else could I have taken it? I have no good ideas, and I'd still feel horrible for moving it so far away from any of it's little mouse relatives or whatever. Don't get me wrong, I know a mouse is NOT a human, and thus they shouldn't be treated the same; however, they're still living, breathing creatures that God has allowed life to enter into and He has sustained them.
I guess all this is just to say... I fear that I will become "okay" with allowing a mouse that I need to get rid of from my residence... that I'll be okay with either whacking it with a shovel, or essentially letting it slowly starve while it's glued to the floor. The very act of removing it causes burden/pain/or death to the mouse, pretty much no matter what. I just don't want... I don't want to have to do it to another mouse. I am NOT okay with how this mouse died. Not even close... but I fear that I one day might be...
I had today off. It was a good day off. I got some things cleared up with my student loan and my "free insulin." They sent 4 bottles for my 6 month supply. Apparently they calculated it via the "daily amount of insulin" I take, and 4 bottles should be enough (even though I had a prescription for 2-3 a month). Also, it will be a bit harder to get my insulin sent here than expected. They only send it to pharmacies if they're a part of a clinic or hospital, so getting it sent to Amy's pharmacy instead is likely to not happen.
As for my student loans, I got the payment lowered for now, so that's nice.
I've been playing Chrono Cross on a PS emulator (a game I own at home) for a bit, which has been fun. Also, Amy and I are starting through the anime series "Samurai Champloo".
Well that's about it for now. God bless, all!
PS - This was funny:
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